addendum to the Colin Farrell sighting

I feel compelled to note, having seen Mr. Farrell on The Today Show this morning and having learned that he went through rehab recently, that he wasn't dropping off the wagon. Let the record show that he was drinking coffee... or maybe tea. Whatever it was was in a coffee cup. So unless he was drinking Bailey's or something, he was staying strong.

By the way, in no way am I a starfucker. I think it's owing to something my Dad said to me when I was very young. When I was less than eight, my family drove down to Disneyland. I don't remember much about the trip but I guess had fun. My Dad always loved to tell this story that I had been so mesmerized by everything that I didn't eat all day. This was a concern since you know how kids get cranky if they don't eat. Anyhow, late in the day we went to the burger place in Tomorrowland and I was really excited about getting the burger and my parents were relieved that they were finally about to get some food in me. I was just on the verge of taking my first bite out of the burger when the floor opened up and a band rose up playing dance music. I was so amazed I ate nothing. But that's not the point. The thing I do remember about the day is being on Tom Sawyer Island and seeing McLean Stevenson.

M*A*S*H was in its first seasons and was the Friends of its time.

I recognized him from the television and watched as people mobbed him and his family. I remember him looking very exasperated and trying to move along but there were too many people for him to get anywhere. My father said to me, "That poor man. He just wants to have a good time with his family and nobody will let him just because of the job he has." That really stuck with me, seeing the celebrity as just another person and someone who probably wants to be left alone. Since then, I've seen numerous famous people, spoken with some of them, and have never really cared.

However, something is different about seeing Colin Farrell. Once I got home and found out that he was going to be on Letterman, I wanted to watch it. Once I found out that he was going to be on this morning, I wanted to watch that. I saw the clip from the movie and the thought ran through my head, "I think I might go see that." Then I realized, Colin Farrell must be demonspawn! He must have some Faustian deal with Satan which lures mere mortals to spend money which eventually ends up in his pockets! Either that or he has some sort of extra-terrestrial pheremones which spark the expense response and makes regular humans want to spend money which eventually ends up in his pockets! No, wait! I bet he's worked some gypsy curse which bewitches the rest of us into spending money which eventually ends up in his pockets! I mean, it can't be me. I'm not impressed by how yummy-cute he is or how charming he is when he's talking to Matt Lauer or how naughty he is. It must be that he's a demonic, alien gypsy-boy!

Excuse me, I have to go spend some money now.