Step 1: Wake up behind schedule.
Step 2: Run out of Cheerios.
Step 3: Come back from putting away iron to find newly pressed clothes on floor.
Step 4: Stub toe when getting iron out for second time, see blood.
Step 5: Knock picture off wall while maneuvering through dark room, trying to stay quiet so as not to wake up the BF.
Step 6: See subway pull up as you swipe your metrocard, get "Swipe again" message over and over... subway pulls away just as metrocard goes through.
Step 7: Realize you forgot to do anything with your hair.
Step 8: Find something sticky-wet on subway holding bar.
Step 9: Huge line at Starbucks
Step 10: Huge line at other Starbucks
Step 11: Huge line at other, other Starbucks
Step 12: Feeling of exceptional guilt for the filthy stream of obscenities unleashed on blasé, bleached, botoxed bitch in 3/4 length fur coat and full-body sense of entitlement who knocks coffee out of hand the minute you get out of Starbucks because she can't be bothered to look where she's going while she's talking on her cell phone and believes that since someone has opened the door it must be open for her... okay, maybe I don't feel all that guilty, after all.
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