Clearly, I made many friends while on vacation...

And we're back!

I have at last returned from chaperoning the school trip to the Caribbean. Rough life, I know, but someone has to do it. Anyhow, the kids were fantastic and my fellow teachers were entirely bearable. There were Mayan ruins, snorkeling with nurse sharks, tubing on subterranean rivers... loads of fun. I am, however, a bit wiped out from being "on" for an entire week. Also, spending a week with these twigs made me feel really fat... and, yes, I know I'm not fat. Anyhow, here's a few pictures...

Going away...

I won't be posting for a while, so here's a little parting thingamahoozit:

Brokeback Mountain Weekly Grocery List
Ennis Del Mar and Jack Twist, Summer, 1963


WEEK ONE

* Beans
* Bacon
* Coffee
* Whiskey


WEEK TWO

* Beans
* Ham
* Coffee
* Whiskey


WEEK THREE

* Beans al fresca
* Thin-sliced Bacon
* Hazelnut Coffee
* Sky vodka & Tanqueray gin
* K-Y gel


WEEK FOUR

* Beans en Salade
* Pancetta
* Coffee (espresso grind)
* 5-6 bottles best Chardonnay
* 2 tubes K-Y gel


WEEK FIVE

* Fresh Fava beans
* Jasmine rice
* Prosciutto, approx. 8 ounces, thinly sliced
* Medallions of veal
* Porcini mushrooms
* 1/2 pint of heavy whipping cream
* 1 Cub Scout uniform, size 42 long
* 5-6 bottles French Bordeaux (Estate Reserve)
* 1 extra large bottle Astro-glide


WEEK SIX

* Yukon Gold potatoes
* Heavy whipping cream
* Asparagus (very thin)
* Organic Eggs
* Spanish Lemons
* Gruyere cheese (well aged)
* Crushed Walnuts
* Arugula
* Clarified Butter
* Extra Virgin Olive oil
* Pure Balsamic vinegar
* 6 yards white silk organdy
* 6 yards pale ivory taffeta
* 3 Cases of Dom Perignon Masters Reserve
* Large tin Crisco

Here's why the sporty types are supposed to use "constriction wear"

And this is not really appropriate for the office, by the way...

VP gone hunting again

After Cheney's little accident this weekend, (and what do you think the chances are that he'll have to stand the indignities of being formally questioned at the police station?), some of the folks over at Huffington Post have come up with an interesting little cartoon. Enjoy!

Happy Blizzard!

Speed Skating German Women Outfitted to Look Like Fembots!

I'm so mad I could haiku!

Scandalous! BebeMoche has engaged in the very behavior she claims to find abhorrent! She has stolen my link for her readers! And yet, I must admit that her creation has turned out exceedingly well. I have no words other than the following:

Bebe stole the link
but gave him the best blizzle
pimped out nutcracker

Such wonderful resources available...

Feeling down, in a rut, or simply want to "spice things up"? A makeover would be just the thing! But you're not sure... you want to see the final product without running the risk of a bad haircut or a non-returnable purchase. Well, now you can try out dozens of new looks without ever stepping into a salon or department store! Create just the look for you BEFORE you go shopping! Follow the link and try it out today!

Olympics!

The Winter Olympics in Torino open today! Okay, so being a total homo, what I like includes the opening ceremonies, sometimes the skating, and the closing ceremonies. I mean, I'll watch lots of the other stuff but I don't really get into it. The ceremonies always get me. The costumes, the fireworks, the spectacle, all are enough to hold my attention. But what really gets to me is the underlying hope that we can all get along, since I'm a complete whore for that brotherhood of man bullshit.

Aside from the extravaganza of the ceremonies, I loves me some hunky athletes. So imagine my dismay when I found out that HotOlympians.com has been taken over by Maxim magazine! I mean, two years ago HotOlympians.com was basically one guy's blog, featuring unabashedly homoerotic pictures of male athletes during the competition, accompanied by casual, witty, personal commentary. Now, it's completely corporate, glitzy and glammed up. Totally uninteresting and sterile. Yuck.

Of course, some people (Fafe) will be happy to know that Hot Olympians now features women as well.

My brush with blisters.. oops! I mean B-listers

So yesterday I'm feeling the need to pick up a couple of pairs of shorts for my upcoming trip to the Caribbean. After work, I get off the subway and decide to detour into Century 21 to see whether or not they have anything. As I enter, the food guy from Queer Eye (Ted) is walking out. He holds the door open for me for which I thank him as I enter. It occurs to me that in real life he looks much more like a bobble-head than he does on TV. I start looking around for shorts and find two pairs, both quite decent and at a fine price, but I'm not entirely certain they'll fit. I'm now on the mezzanine level and I head over to where I think the fitting rooms are, only to be stopped by a LARGE man who tells me, very courteously and in a lilting, slightly lispy voice (totally incongruous to his LARGE form) that he's very sorry, but this area is closed right now. So I ask where I might find the open rooms. He says that he believes that they are over there, on the left, but if I ask one of the women in the purple coats they'll be able to tell me for certain. I thank him and I'm on my way. Now, if you've been to C21, then you know just how other-worldly this entire experience has been. A (sort of) celebrity? Courtesy? At C21? This makes absolutely no sense, whatsoever! As I head towards the other side of the mezzanine I notice that the employees in front of me are standing around, talking to each other, ignoring customers, the normal C21 stuff. However, they're upbeat, active, NOT acting like undead minions of the damned. It's all so confusing! Then, as I get past them, I find that the way is blocked by three cameras and Carson Kressley telling a make-over-getting-straight-guy, "A man of your age shouldn't be wearing this!" Finally, all was clear: the quasi-celebs, the producer whom I mistook for a C21 employee (hence the courtesy), the approximation of life in the expressions of the real employees, I understood it all. So when I got downstairs and the somnambulant cashier graciously took time out of her conversation with her comatose coworker to ignore me as she rang up my purchase, I was much relieved that things were back to normal.

Lowery's standing ovation

Rev. Lowery, speaking at the funeral for Coretta Scott King, let loose some choice words about Bush, while the president was right there. He got a standing ovation for it, too. Makes you wonder what was going through W's brain...

The British could start pulling out of Iraq as early as May

Not only is it just this huge, frickin' mess, not only are things getting messier, now we're going to be going it alone.

Watching the internet

There used to be a channel on cable, Trio, which had some interesting stuff but it was so high up in the cable stratosphere that I usually forgot about anything they might have on. They had this one interesting series called Briiliant But Cancelled which would revive the pilots of shows which the critics loved but the networks quickly axed. Well, now Trio has been moved to the internet... ENTIRELY. So now if you're interested you can just download the shows. (They're only in Windows or RealPlayer, so I have to use the big computer, not my laptop, and the BF has been non-stop busy for days.) They also have Mr. Bill... (which really dates me, doesn't it?)

It's good to be done with grading and be able to web-surf a bit again.

Blog Readers Reveal Dark Underbellies

Simple logic escapes Alfredo, BebeMoche attacks an unsuspecting D-list country, both offend the time-honored rules of haiku composition... what is the world coming to?